Cooker Hoop!
Taken from Melody Maker, 20 December 1997

Pulp love Christmas - but can't wait for the parties of New Year. We ask them for their thoughts on the festive season.

Where would you spend your perfect Christmas and who with?

Jarvis Cocker: Somewhere is Switzerland with all my friends and family... and some figgy pudding. Access to bob-sleighing facilities would be essential.
Nick Banks: In suspended animation or lounging around an isolated Pacific island miles from anywhere.
Candida Doyle: There'd be lots of snow, lots of delicious food, lots of champagne, lots of carols and lots of people.
Mark Webber: In a room, with a girl.

How did you spend Christmas as a child?

Jarvis: I used to stay awake on Christmas Eve so I could open my presents as soon as my mum put them in the bedroom.
Nick: It was very traditional... all the family at granny's with fag ash in the turkey dinner!
Candida: Very happily.
Mark: Upstairs in my bedroom playing records.

What's the best present you've received? What's the worst?

Jarvis: My first electric guitar was the best present. Maybe it was also the worst.
Nick: Probably Scalextric the other year. The worst? There's been so many:
1) Gino Ferrari gift set (two years running). Not fit for drain clearance.
2) Nice chunky jumper off the market with the swim badges sewn on that I had been awarded when I was 16. However, this was when I was 27.
3) T-shirt badly embroidered with 'Pulp' on the back and 'Nick' on the front. My mother said, 'They can't see who you are sat at the back!' Never worn. Now used as an oily rag.
Candida: The best was a long mohair stripey jumper. The worst was an Adam & The Ants' LP.
Mark: I have a bad memory.

Is Christmas important to you?

Jarvis: Anything that interrupts the usual flow of life has got to be all right, that's what I say.
Nick: Not really, I prefer New Year's Eve.
Candida: Yes, very much so. I love it.
Mark: Only if done tastefully.

How will you be spending Christmas this year?

Jarvis: In the bosom of my family. Everybody needs a bosom.
Nick: With the entire family, in-laws the lot, round ours. Nightmare.
Candida: In Sheffield.

Is Christmas different now that you're famous?

Jarvis: Everyday is Christmas when you're famous.
Nick: I don't think so.
Candida: I have lots more money to spend on presents.
Mark: Don't be stupid.

What's your favourite Christmas record and film?

Jarvis: 'I Believe In Father Christmas' by Greg Lake and any Busby Berkely film.
Nick: I Believe In Father Christmas' by Greg Lake and 'The Wizard Of Oz'.
Candida: 'I Believe In Father Christmas' by Greg Lake and 'The Wizard Of Oz'.
Mark: 'Hey Lord' by Suicide...

Which celebrity would you most like to buy a present for?

Jarvis: A chest freezer for Rick Astley.
Candida: I'd get Lou Reed a book entitled, 'How To Respect Songs You Have Written'.
Mark: I'd like to buy Tara Palmer-Tomkinson a taxi round to my house.

What are your plans for New Year's Eve?

Jarvis: Get hammered. Lose consciousness around 11:45. Miss 'Auld Lang Syne'. Why change the habit of a lifetime?
Nick: Down the Washington [Nick's pub in Sheffield] we've got a good collection of old radios, so I'm going to try to get them all working and then set them up to broadcast the sounds of Big Ben simultaneously at midnight followed by a rousing rendition of 'Auld Lang Syne'. Oh, and drinks.
Candida: I don't know.
Mark: I'm not sure yet, but I won't be attending any public events.

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